


Honest Work (For A Thief) If You Can Get It

by Shay_Moonsilk



Series: Acorns And Arrogance Universe [2]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Families of Choice, Family Drama, Family Feels, Friends to Lovers, Gen, Hobbit Courting, Hobbit Culture, M/M, Mpreg, Shotgun Wedding, consentual kidnapping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-26
Updated: 2015-05-01
Packaged: 2018-03-25 21:17:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 12,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3825358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shay_Moonsilk/pseuds/Shay_Moonsilk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nori has a list of regrets longer then his arm, and those regrets have caused his family to splinter and fall in pieces. His older brother is a glorified servant to a princess, and his other brother is far from the mountain. All in the name of his redemption. But redemption doesn’t come easy for a thief rich in information, forced in a job and a lifestyle he despises. </p><p>But there’s Bofur. </p><p>So maybe it’s not all bad.</p><p>-Prequel to Acorns and Arrogance-</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. On the Path to Redemption

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the Nori side story to “Acorns and Arrogance,” and it goes into what Nori was going through in the events before, during, and after the original story. You don’t need to know a single thing about A&A to understand this – if anything, this should have come out first. This features gratuitous fanfiction, cannon deviance in the most extreme, my own headcanons about fictional characters, and mpreg. I understand this may squick people, and I recommend you turn back now. But honestly, in a world where there are elves, men, dwarrow, hobbits, orcs, wizards, and a tower of an evil deity that looks like a vagina, giant eagles that carry people, men that fight over a single dainty ring, and no women, should we REALLY be drawing the line at men getting pregnant? 
> 
> This has been beta-read by the lovely Stevie_Foxx. I can’t thank you enough, truly.

Nori doesn’t remember what the final straw is that gets him in his current situation. But all he knows is that he’s in jail, Captain Dwalin’s scowl is thunderous, it’s his thirteenth offense, and he’s about to lose his right hand. 

He doesn’t want to lose his hand. 

For a moment he wishes he were a dwarfling and he could cry for Dori (always Dori, never his mother, definitely not his father, but Dori where he could curl into him and hide away from the world.) 

But Dori is there, and he’s trying stubbornly not to cry, and a cold pit in Nori’s stomach forms when he realizes that Dori can’t protect him now. That’s not even the worst part. The worst part is that Ori is there (because their mother is dead and he’s only five, still a baby in their standards, and can’t be left alone). He doesn’t seem to be aware of what’s happening, simply sleeping quietly on Dori’s hip. Hopefully he won’t scream too loudly and wake the baby when they take his hand. But he knows that he will, and this can just be added to that list of regrets. 

That’s when the impossible happens. 

Another dwarf enters the jail, and all action beforehand ceases. It’s obviously someone important, because it makes Dwalin stop dead, and all the guards bow. But guards only bow for royalty… 

“Princess Dis.” The Captain greet the newcomer, and Nori feels incredulous. Why would she be here? What business would any member of the royal family have here? And of all times, when he’s about to lose his hand? 

“I heard a member of the Ri family was in trouble.” She says, and that pit in Nori’s stomach only gets bigger. Of course. 

Everyone knows that his family is part of the line of Durin, but only because one of his ancestor’s was a mistress for one of Durin’s descendants, and out of propriety the child was recognized, though bastardized. It’s enough that occasionally they can receive perks, but no self-respecting dwarf ever brings it up. Yet now it seems to be to their benefit that it’s one of those secrets that everyone knows.  

Princess Dis is a powerful and imposing figure. While Thorin is the crown prince, and Frerin is the warrior prodigy, Dis is the true politician. Resolute and unyielding, she knows how to play her cards close to her chest, and when someone may be of benefit to her. Her beauty is legendary throughout the mountain, but it’s whispered in reverence because of her reputation. It makes him nervous as to what her intentions are with their family that she is there at that precise moment, before he is to lose his hand. Dori seems to be thinking along the same lines, because his grip on Ori tightens, and in a voice that is steadier than Nori feels he answers, “Yes, Princess. It’s my brother, Nori. He’s about to lose his hand.”

She acknowledges the statement by giving Dwalin a stern look of reproach. He scowls in return. “It’s not my doing. You know our laws. This is the thirteenth offense – it’s what happens.”

“A royal pardon would erase the charges though.” The Princess counters, and Nori’s glad no one is looking at him because his jaw has dropped. Dwalin’s also shocked. Dis looks to Dori. 

“You’re the head of the family, yes?” 

Dori nods. Dis is silent for several moments. 

“I will pardon your brother of his crimes, but I have two conditions. If Nori agrees to a sentence for his crime, and you foster my sons and act as a steward for my house, I will see that his record is erased.”

In that moment, his own axis has shifted. There’s no way he can accept. That would make Dori a glorified butler and a servant. And there’s no telling what jail will do to him, or what will happen after. But at the same time, there’s only one answer to give. 

“I accept.” Dori’s voice is kept neutral. He shifts Ori to his other side, and Nori begins to feel dread. 

With the tasks that Dis has outlined, and him in jail, who is supposed to look after Ori? 

Dis’ next statement is tinged with regret, because she seems to realize this as well. 

“Will a week be plenty to arrange your other affairs?”

If she weren’t the reason he still had a hand, he’d throttle her for referring to Ori that way. And for only giving Dori a week to find someone suitable. But what is Dori going to do? 

Except that he nods (and that’s Dori – the dwarf who’s always prepared, who cleans up after Nori messes up, and constantly has to take care of all of them and he knows he’ll feel terrible for years thereafter), and tells her that he will report to her house in one week’s time. 

Then he’s dragged away as Dori leaves, and belatedly he realizes that he didn’t get the chance to say goodbye to either of them. 

It’s the last time he’ll see his family for another thirty years. 

\--

Neither Dori or Ori are there when he is released from jail. Not that they would have known when he was getting released – he wasn’t really allowed to exchange letters. Yet here he is, fifteen years later, now free. 

“You’re not free.” 

Stupid Guard Dwalin.

“This is a probation for yeh. For ten years, work in the mines. That’s your parole. And then, you can start over, however you wish.” 

How very noble and kind of these dwarves. 

Dwalin didn’t seem to notice his scorn. Instead, Nori found himself standing where he was fifteen years ago, where he was supposed to lose his hand. Where he was supposed to go home with Dori. With Ori. How old was he now? Where was he, even? Certainly not in that room. Dori isn’t there either. Instead, there’s another dwarf wearing the most ridiculous hat Nori’d ever seen. 

And he’s smiling. 

It honestly offends him. 

“My name’s Bofur.” The cheery dwarf introduces. “I’m a miner, and your parole officer of a sorts.” It all seems amusing to him that he’s been tasked with this. Nori’s eyes narrow at him. Ten years of labor with this idiot to report to. It almost makes him wish for his jail cell.  

“You’ll report to him everyday.” Dwalin says, ignoring Nori’s glowering, “And he’ll report to me. If I like what he writes, you’re good.” 

And isn’t it his luck that he’s been officially saddled with this too-cheerful dwarf as his one barrier from absolute freedom? 

Once his irritation falls to a more agreeable level, he will admit that Bofur isn’t too hard on the eyes. And that his dimples are fetching. But only to himself. 


	2. From Strangers To Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nori begins the long parole period with that dammed cheerful dwarf. But is it really as bad as it seems?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta-read by the fantabolous Stevie_Foxx

His day in the mines go like this. 

Waking up is an ongoing battle. He opens his eyes, and every ounce of his body wants him to close them and fall back asleep.  Then he remembers, “You have to get up, and go to work, or everything Dori gave up for you would be for nothing.” Then it’s much easier to get up. 

Breakfast is oatmeal – quick and easy for him to make and eat in a relative hurry. Nori isn’t exactly a morning person (which doesn’t make him very hungry) but he only had to make the mistake of not eating once before a long day at the mines to learn that that was not a mistake to be repeated. Then, he grabs his pick-axe and drags himself to the entrance, waking up more and more with every step.

Things pick up a bit when he gets there.

Once he got past the cheerfulness, the dimples, and the chatter, Bofur turns out to be not that bad. Despite how grouchy Nori feels, Bofur always manages to get conversation out of him, and it helps the day go by that much quicker. It doesn’t mean working there is easy – he’s not cut out for it, and it’s miserable work to have, but he fully well knows it could be worse.

He could be handless, or in jail. It keeps him up at night. He’s torn between feeling grateful to his brother and the princess and angry at them for making him end up in this situation. These are the thoughts that circle around his head the entire day until Bofur announces that they’re done, and they should be heading to the tavern if they want that good table near the window. 

Nori does what he says, because it really is a good table. 

\--

Bofur becomes the only Good Part about his day. 

He tries not to think about what that means. 

\--

Letters from Dori begin to fit the daily routine – he writes one once a week and receives them about the same pace. Dori told him about how Ori had been given to a nice hobbit-lady and her husband (they’d been good friends to him in the past) and that Belladonna and Bungo Baggins had been taking good care of their Ori for the past several years. 

‘He’s close with their son, Bilbo, and they adopted another child named Frodo. The Shire is peaceful and he’s comfortable there. Fits right in with all of them.’ 

It’s not right – he’s a dwarf and should be with fellow dwarves – but he supposes its his own fault that Ori is growing up a hobbit, and instead he tells Dori he’s happy their youngest brother is well. 

Dori grazes over the details of working for the Princess, but it doesn’t seem that she’s too cruel of an employer. Her children had been something of a handle, at first, but Dori put them to rights soon enough. She seemed to be indebted to him for that. 

In return, Nori speaks briefly about the mines (honestly saying that he detests it but promising that he’ll see it through). He includes the gossip that he overhears (because these minors talk louder then they hammer, and its not his fault they know interesting things, and Dori is such a sucker for gossip even if he doesn’t know who it’s about), and Bofur. 

He’s not sure how to describe Bofur. The dwarf is all but impossible to describe on paper. How is he supposed to write about his friendliness, or that  adorable ludicrous the way he laughs at all Nori’s stupid jokes, the way his eyes light up when talking about his brother’s children, or how he always seems to know what Nori is thinking or feeling with just a simple gesture, or the way his smile melts his heart when Nori says something amusing and how his heart and stomach flip on those occasions? 

Instead he puts that “Bofur’s my friend, my only friend here. I’d go mad without him.’

It’s inappropriate to fall for one’s parole officer. Even if he gets drinks with that officer every night and one of their best pastimes is to see who can irritate the guards the most without arousing suspicion (it’s not breaking any laws, just being a nuisance, and while Bofur is supposed to keep him straight and narrow he’s not above having fun at Captain Dwalin’s expense.) 

Nori’s finding it harder and harder not to fall for someone just that bloody perfect.  

\--

The last night of his parole comes all too soon. 

The day itself went as his routine usually goes, but the knowledge that it’s his last day gives him something of a spring in his step. He even finds it easy to get up in the morning, and it’s tough to say whose smile is brighter when the day begins, Bofur’s or his. Nori thought Bofur would be happy for him (the damn dwarf is so bloody cheerful about everything) but if anything, the opposite happens. Bofur’s bright smile dims as the day goes on, and he’s practically frowning by the time their work is done. And when the work is done, he doesn’t even bring up that they need to hurry to get their table (because that’s basically what it is now, and only one time did a group of dwarrow make the mistake of sitting there to learn that they must never do it again – nothing nefarious, Nori and Bofur had constructed a feather-and-egg contraption to fall on them when they left and they looked so silly and it had been so much fun). 

But Bofur doesn’t seem keen on going. 

If doesn’t occur to Nori that he didn’t make the offer until they’ve placed their tools back in their workstations. Then Bofur gives him the brightest smile he’d worn all day (but has absolutely no light and doesn’t make his insides go warm) that Nori realizes why the routine has been thrown. 

“Welp, guess I’ll be seeing you around.” 

Nori is stunned. Why is Bofur leaving?

“We’re supposed to go to the tavern – don’t want to have to prank a few idiot dwarrow again like last time we were late.” Bofur’s smile is sad. “It’s ok. You don’t need to go with me. I’ll tell Captain Dwalin you’re all sorted out, enjoy your first night of freedom.” 

It’s at that moment that Nori could kick himself for being so blind. He could know the family history and current dramas of every dwarf in their section of the mines, but how in Mahal’s name could he have missed this? 

Bofur was lonely. 

He was most cheerful dwarf in Arda – that much was plain. But while he always had a smile and a kind word for everyone, he didn’t have many friends. There was his cousin and brother (who were very nice to Nori, and he’d been over to the Ur home for dinners, because they knew how lonely he was when the work was done and it was nice for him to pretend he had a family again), but Bofur only spent time with them, and him. Everyday. For all of his charisma, there were few people who actually knew Bofur. 

But now that it’s his last night, Bofur doesn’t think he’d want anything to do with him anymore. Some part of Nori - that same dratted part that melted when he laughed or went warm when he smiled - swelled in anguish. This situation must be fixed. 

“I don’t care if it’s my last night.” Nori scowls, “We have a tradition, and that’s what friends do. I was hoping Bombur would’ve thrown a party for this or something – for all you brag about his cake.” 

Bofur laughs, and it’s a relieved sort of laugh. That part of Nori that had been nervous relaxes. 

“They wanted too, but I thought you’d have friends to celebrate with already.” Nori scoffs. “I do. And he just told my other friend not to make a cake, so I’m not sure if that’s still true.” 

He’s trying hard to ignore the feeling he got when he realized that Bofur was giving his beautiful laugh because of him, but he knows he’s not kidding himself. 


	3. The Benefits of Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I bet you can guess what's involved here. Maybe one day I'll write something more explicit, but my comfort level isn't quite there yet, unfortunately.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, a shout-out to Stevie_Foxx for putting up with little ol' me.

They begin sleeping together a while after that. 

It’s tough not to take his newfound freedom and go back to thieving, but Nori finds a certain pleasure in stealing and keeping secrets. Then he realizes how much more valuable information is then any gold or silver trinket. Before long, he becomes the master of secrets in the mines (which he decides to stay in because these stupid minors don’t keep their traps shut) and when dwarves realize what he knows, well, they become quite afraid of him. 

It’s beautiful. 

He learns interesting things – about who is having an affair with whom, who hasn’t been paying taxes, and who’s conspiring to rise to power and overthrow the nobility. 

That last one is obviously the most interesting. 

Keeping these secrets, well, secret, is part of what gives him his credibility of spymaster, but what’s the point of having a best friend if you can’t tell them anything?

Which of course Bofur is. His best friend. And nothing else. 

“So Harukun said-”

He’s caught up in his story, gesticulating wildly. The beauty of talking to him at their table in their tavern is that he can speak in a normal decibel and absolutely no-one is listening in. And story-telling had always been his unanswered calling. 

So he hadn’t been paying attention to Bofur, and that’s why he stunned when the other dwarf kisses him. 

But it happens. 

There’s a moment when his mind turns off because this is Bofur – his best (only) friend, the best part of his day, the dwarf whose family took him in and-

This is Bofur. Who’s smile brightens his mood whenever he sees him. Who helped him become a better dwarf. Who he’s crazy about. 

Bofur pulls away and looks embarrassed. Nori snaps out of his shock and pulls him back in for another kiss before he can apologize. Turns out he kisses as well as he laughs.

Nori thought he was reformed, but he’d gladly steal these kisses as often as he’d get them. 

\--

They don’t tell Bombur or Bifur – it’s too new, too sudden. Dori doesn’t know either. Nori simply keeps referring to Bofur as his best friend, and in a sense, it’s true. 

His routine doesn’t much change. Waking up is still a pain. The work isn’t as bad, but mostly because he’s focusing on what he can hear and use. Then he and Bofur go to their table. And if sometimes a kiss or three is had, and they go back to Nori’s place for the night, well, that’s no-ones’ business but there’s. 

They just tell Bombur that Bofur’d been too drunk to go all the way home when he asks. 

The secrecy is almost as thrilling as the relationship itself. Almost. 

There’s not much in the way of romance between them, and Nori finds that aside from the physical stuff (and oh how nice the physical stuff is) nothing really changed. 

Until everything changes. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah I suck. Update will be out soon I swear.


	4. Worth It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It would seem that Nori and Bofur forgot what makes a baby.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2 - 4 - 6- 8   
> Who do we appreciate?  
> GOOOOO  
> Stevie_Foxx!!!   
> (Who is a Beta!!) 
> 
> ALSO - We're catching up to where we met their characters in Acorns and Arrogance. Now the story is going to coincide with the events that happen in that story. So if you've read A&A, this will make a little more sense though it isn't necessary to know.

The day starts as they all do. He gets up. He eats. He goes into the mines. But Bofur isn’t there. 

Nori does his work, and goes straight to Bombur’s house, and is told that Bofur was ill that morning and didn’t go in. In the last thirty years that they’d known each other, Bofur had never been sick. Dwarves don’t get sick. 

He offers to take him to see a doctor, and Bombur looks relieved (with a family as large as his he just didn’t have the time, which is probably why he wasn’t more suspicious that Bofur was even sick in the first place). 

Neither of them say anything on the way to the healer, because neither wants to think about what they may hear. Through sheer stubbornness, Nori forces himself to believe that it’s just a bug, nothing more. 

It’s something more. 

Bofur’s pregnant. 

They’re told together because the doctor assumes they’re married. He realizes his mistake at their reaction to the news. 

Bofur’s face turns ashen – the normally cheerful dwarf who always has a smile looks as if he has a day to live, and Nori-

Nori remembers his own father, the one he and Ori share, that abandoned them after their mother was pregnant with Ori. The whole reason he’d turned to thievery, the whole reason his brothers are a world away and right now all he wants is Dori because Dori knows what to do, Dori’s always known what to do and none of this is fair-

Because he’s not ready to be a father, he just got rid of his criminal record, and he and Bofur weren’t even courting, just having fun, and now what to they do? 

He doesn’t realize that he’s said the last part aloud until he realizes Bofur is scowling at him. Without another word, he gets up and leaves. 

That pit in Nori’s stomach begins to form and churn nastily.

\--

It’s times like these when he wishes Dori was with him. That he could curl up in his lap and ask his big brother what to do. 

He misses Dori and Ori so much. What’s become of them? 

Sure, he’s seen letters from Dori. But how true are they? His own never even mentioned Bofur as more than a friend. And he knows absolutely nothing about what his brothers are actually doing, and that hurts. 

During the moments of his wallowing in self-pity, he comes to the realization that he doesn’t have to be upset. Because he’s not alone. He hadn’t been alone the day Captain Dwalin introduced him to that annoying dwarf who wormed his way into his heart and stayed there. 

That makes figuring out what to do much easier. 

\-- 

Bofur is sitting at their table, using his hat as a shield and disguising himself with a heavy stare and a frown. Nori spots him instantly and hates himself for being the reason that Bofur is anything less than cheerful. 

“Hello.” The miner jumps when Nori takes a seat across from him. Bofur looks at him but doesn’t say anything. On an impulse, Nori places his hands on the table and reaches across. It’s rare for him to look at another with honest need, but Bofur’s the only one who can pull it from him. Slowly, the other dwarf takes his hands. Nori had been searching for the words to use as he made his way over, but couldn’t think of any. But now, he finds that words come easily. 

“I don’t deserve you. No-it’s true,” He continues, going over Bofur’s objection, “You’re always kind, cheerful, and happy. And I’ve a rotten past. I tore apart my own family and spent decades just getting rid of my record. But the only reason I made it into work every day was so I can see you, because you’ve been the best part of my day for a long time now. And I love you.” Bofur’s eyes are misting now, and Nori has to keep going or he’ll cry with him, “I love you, and you’ve given me something very precious. There’s a lot I’ve done wrong in life, but I want to do right by you. I promise to always be there for you and the babe. To make you smile everyday, and give the two of you everything I have. I’m breaking tradition, but will you marry me?” 

Bofur is actually crying slightly, but gives a choking laugh and a nod. 

\--

Bofur’s the one to tell his brother and cousin, and Nori is not at all ashamed to say that he took cover behind his pregnant lover when they raged at them both. After they say their piece, they offer their congratulations and Bombur and his wife begin to make a congratulatory meal for their engagement and Bofur’s pregnancy. Bifur laughs at Nori for cowering behind his pregnant cousin. He isn’t even sorry – Bifur has a bloody axe in his head; how can that not terrify him?

Besides, it made Bofur laugh, and that made it worth it. 

The cake also makes it worth it. 


	5. Family Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nori finally has his brothers back, but do they want to be back?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Stevie_Foxx beta'd for me, and all I own are my paychecks from work and the ideas to this story. 
> 
> We're also now at the overlapping part with A&A, so some of the dialogue will be familiar because there are parts where I literally copied and pasted (though I did edit some of it).

That night, they’re back at Nori’s home, curled together in his bed.  (Bombur had wanted to keep to tradition and keep Bofur with him up until the wedding, but the dwarf has snorted. “Why? Afraid I’ll get knocked up?” And that had been that.) Nori has an arm curled around Bofur’s waist, and wonders what it will be like when there is a bump there. “Too soon to be showing.” Bofur tells him, as if he didn’t already know. “But we’ll have to get married in the next week.” 

Which is also true - Bofur is farther along then one would think at a glance of him, but all too soon it will be very visibly obvious that he’s pregnant. 

Aside from the break in tradition, the timing alone is terrible. Dori’s employment with the Princess had just ended, and he was fetching Ori to bring him back to the Mountain. Nori had been ecstatic to introduce the Ur’s to the Ri’s, though he hadn’t realized the two families would come together quite like this. 

“I’ll have to write them so they get back in time.” He muses, because he needs his brothers to stand with him at the wedding. Bofur hums.  “But I don’t want to write him.” 

“It’s your brother.” The other reminds him, “And ‘sides, I told my family. And they were fine.” 

“Yeah, but this is Dori.” Nori groans, “He’ll kill me.” 

\--

Dori doesn’t kill him. But it’s a close thing. 

“What were you  thinking ?  Were you thinking?” It never failed – Dori was his big brother, and always managed to make Nori feel like a disobedient dwarfling, not the father-and-husband-to-be that he actually was. Maybe telling him in a letter that he was getting married in a week (or tomorrow now) hadn’t been the best way to do it, but what else was he supposed to do? The plan hadn’t been for Dori to go traipsing along the west to Bree, Rivendell, and Hobbiton! And to be courting with Balin? What was that, even? But he knew that when Dori had worked himself up, it was best just to let him rant and rave, and then he’d be allowed to say his piece. Until then he had to look like he was paying attention, because Dori wasn’t done yet. 

“This is hardly ideal for the family –  especially with Ori about to move into the mountain!”  

As if he didn’t already know that. (And how it hurt that little Ori – baby Ori when he last saw him, but was now all grown up – didn’t even know who he was or recognize him in any way) 

“You weren’t thinking at all!” Dori was so angry he was repeating himself, “You know the rules to this sort of thing! There are procedures we are bound to follow. And you are breaking all of them! Bofur, from what you’ve said of him, seems perfectly lovely, and his family is certainly agreeable. I would certainly not mind getting to know his family over a courtship, but we must  have a courtship first! You need to put off the wedding by at least two years for it to all be proper, and for there to be no lost respect on either side.”

Well, it was time for the full truth to come out. He wondered how upset Bofur would be to raise their child on their own, because Dori was going to kill him.

“Bof and I don’t have time to be proper!” Nori finally replied. And, because he couldn’t resist, he added, “And we can’t all be perfect like you and that fancy lord.” 

Maybe the insult to Lord Balin was unwarranted (and like he wasn’t in enough trouble?) but not knowing when to stop had never been his best trait and it would be a cold day in Morder before he would miss a chance to rile up his brother. Because if Dori made him feel like a child he was going to act like one. Dori glowered at him. 

“Don’t bring Balin and I into this – this is about you acting rashly!” He took a deep breath and forced himself to calm down. In a different tone he said, “Just give the two of you at least a year of formal courtship, you’ll regret it if you don’t.”

“You think I don’t know that? I’d’ve loved to do the standard year for courting and engagement!” This had gone on long enough, “We just… have to rush things a bit.”

Dori paled.

“Nori… you didn’t.”

“Bofur’s pregnant.” Nori confessed. There were a few moments of tense silence. Nori held his breath. Dori buried his face in his hands and groaned. 

“Nori…”

That pit in his stomach grew and he fidgeted anxiously. It wasn’t fair. Dori was supposed to be mad, like Bombur and Bifur had been. Yelling should be involved. Dori wasn’t supposed to be disappointed. 

That was far worse.

Nori fidgeted again, and indignantly replied. “Look – I know it’s not ideal, and it doesn’t exactly look good for us, what with Ori moving back in, but it happened.” His face took an earnest look. “Dori, I love him. And he loves me. We got too eager, and acted like idiots, but neither of us regret what we’re doing. And yeah,” now he looked sheepish, “Bombur and Bifur look like they’re gonna kill me whenever they look at me, but Bofur’s happy, and that’s really all that matters.”

Dori slowly looked back up at him, and while he didn’t look happy, he didn’t look too upset. He seemed fond. 

“You’re right – it’s not too ideal. But you’re doing the right thing here. And It’ll be nice to see the family grow and…oh my.” He seemed perplexed, and then let out a laugh that startled Nori. “This makes me an uncle, doesn’t it?” 

The relief Nori felt took his breath away and he laughed at the look on Dori’s face when he realized it. His brother scoffed at him, but then pulled him into a hug, and if Dori’s shirt felt damp he pretended not to notice. 

It was over fifteen years, and he was hugging his brother again. His family was finally back together. 

\--

He didn’t realize until much later that Ori felt out of place in the mountain. Later, Bofur and Dori would regretfully tell him about the way Ori’s hands shook during the ceremony from nervousness, and how he hadn’t been able to hold a conversation with Bifur because of his limited khuzdel (Bombur’s children knew more then him), and how Bombur had thought him a cute little thing, but very odd. His children treated him with the same curiosity and fascination that they treated the hobbits, because, to them, Ori was a tall hobbit. Then Nori lost track of him during the lunch after, and never got a chance to talk to him before Bungo and Belladonna (the hobbits that Ori actually called ‘Mother’ and ‘Father’) announced that they had to leave. And Ori was going with them. 

“I thought you’d be moving back.” Nori said, because dammit if he knew Ori was leaving now he would’ve tried to talk to him more and sooner, because he  just got his brother back and now he was leaving! Then he realized that he had no clue how to even talk to the other dwarf, and wasn’t that just pathetic of him? 

“I need to get back home.” Ori said, not looking either of them in the eye. And the fact that he considers the Shire his home is enough to make Nori feel entirely too guilty. “And Bilbo needs me.” He doesn’t offer more than that, and it makes Nori realize that he considers Bilbo his brother, and that they have a relationship that he and Ori should have had. And Nori can’t even go back with him, because now he’s married, and going to have a baby.   

The eagles take off, and Nori’s guilt increases. 

\--

Balin and Dori tell him about the infatuation between Ori and Dwalin.  

Captain Dwalin.

The one who’d arrested him all those times, and nearly took off his hand. 

The one who’d abided by Princess Dis’ terms and made his prison sentence bearable. 

The one who’d introduced him to Bofur as his parole office. 

Nori’s torn between raging at the sod for liking his baby brother (and Dwalin is older than him), and laughing because  that sod was besotted with his baby brother.


	6. New Routine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nori's all about his routines. Funny how spontaneous overbearing family make the routine so entertaining.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a confession to make: 
> 
> I didn't originally write The Hobbit. I know, contain your shock and indignation. But I do own my thoughts (mostly) and unlike my other story, I actually own my own plot. Imagine that. I also own some strawberries, and cookie butter. So I have that going for me, which is nice. 
> 
> Also, the feedback ya'll have been giving me in incredible. It makes me blush and squee like it's no-body's business. 
> 
> And, as always, thank you to Stevie_Foxx for looking over this, and listening to my insane ramblings.

Bofur’s pregnancy is hard. Nori realizes that they made the right decision to marry as soon as they found out, because Bofur suffers one too many fainting spells in the weeks that follow and is soon confided into bed rest. Working in the mines is out. 

To keep himself sane, Bofur spends his time whittling and smiling good-naturedly at Bombur, Bifur, and Dori and putting up with their collective fussing. It makes Nori respect him that much more – if it were him he’d go insane. The poor former minor also has to put up with Oin checking in on him everyday for check-ups.   

And how odd is it that his brother-in-law is the King’s advisor – that his cousin is the Royal family’s physician. That Oin thinks nothing of entering his tiny home to look at his husband like they’re noblemen. 

He later finds out that Oin’s frequent stops are Balin’s doing – apparently he takes being a future uncle even more seriously than Dori, and Nori didn’t think that was possible. Apparently, Balin stressed to Oin that as his cousin, he should be concerned with caring for members of his family. It’s completely ridiculous. 

(“ We’re not hobbits,” Dori had said defensively when Nori asked him, “ Our children are rare and few in between. If Balin wants to help you by sending his cousin, by the Maker above you will say thank you and let them do their jobs!” )

At first Nori thought it was hilarious, and put up with it good-naturedly. But as the months go by, Bofur’s dizzy spells increase, and he outright faints a few times. It honestly terrifies him, and he grows more and more worried.

(He’s messed up so many times in his life, he sent one brother in servitude and another in exile and condemned himself to a terrible job but it was all worth it to meet Bofur, the one thing that is his and his to have forever and now they’re going to have a baby and he just  can’t lose them he can’t.)

His routine now goes something like this: 

He wakes up even earlier than he’s used to, but he does so slowly, with his nose pressed against the back of Bofur’s head, arm wrapped around the stomach that was swelling more and more everyday. He loves the fact that he gets to wake up like this, that this is his life now. Then he’d kiss Bofur because now he gets to all the time - first to his head and next to his neck, before getting up and starting the day. 

Bifur has been staying with them, something he didn’t like at first (Bifur may accept their relationship, but he’ll still scowl at Nori for knocking their Bofur up before courting him properly, as if Nori didn’t already blame himself for that because  dammit he knows Bofur deserved better ), but soon he came to appreciate his and all their family’s help. Bifur and Nori eat in silence, and then Nori leaves for work. In an hour, Bifur will be waking up his partner to coax him into eating some porridge for breakfast – one of the few foods that he can eat without getting sick afterwards. And if something happens while he’s gone (which only concerns him every damn day) Bifur will be here to fetch help.  

So Nori relies on him pretty heavily.

For a few hours he would go to the mines – which he hates doing without Bofur because it's honestly so boring to him, and it doesn’t feel right, and let’s the routine motions carry him through the day. 

And listening to other dwarves. 

That makes it go faster. 

After that, fighting down the overwhelming urge to race home because the nagging feeling of ‘what if something horrible has happened’ would always be at its worst precisely when he was done for the day, he made his way to their Post Office to write a letter to Ori. 

It was one thing to know he has a little brother he never saw much of, but then to actually see him was another thing entirely. Nori realized how important it was that they have a relationship now that they’d met. 

And selfishly, he was going to be a father very soon, and if there was one thing he knew his kid would have that he hadn’t had was a stable family, and that included uncles. Nori wasn’t the calligrapher Dori and Balin told him Ori was (and oh how it hurt that Balin knew so much about Ori when he knew so little) but he knew enough of his letters to write to him. 

He’d also check for responses, and so far hadn’t received any. 

Swallowing disappointment ( because he knew he deserved this and maybe one day they’ll be close, but he has no right to rush Ori before he’s ready ) he makes his way back to the house. Bifur gives him a nod when he walks through the front door, and then will gesture to the sink, to let Nori know how many times Bofur was able to eat that day. There’s always at least one bowl, on the better days there are two. Once it was three, but that day was not repeated. Dori would have stopped by also, and he always gives Bofur tea (Bofur always smiles, drinks it, and says thank you, and this means that Bofur is now Dori’s favorite because Ori isn’t responding to his letters either). Nori will then get some water and bring that to Bofur. 

He always manages to wake his husband to drink, and on better days (two bowl days) Bofur is lucid enough to hold conversation with him. He’ll always ask if Nori received anything in the mail, and then give Nori that beautiful smile that makes his heart stutter and reassure him that he will get a response, and not to give up. Then they talk about other things – if Nori overheard anything interesting in the mines (he always does), any names to give the baby, and Bofur’s favorite topic, ‘Nori’s Next Job’. 

(“You hate the mines,” Bofur always says calmly, with that damned patient smile on his face, “And once I pop this one out I can focus on you doin’ somethin’ else.” Nori will always ignore that tone, and will then reproach him for referring to the upcoming birth as “popping it out”. It’s better then the name Bofur’s given himself, which is “the incubator.”)

They hold conversation long enough for Oin to arrive and while the doctor is looking at his husband, Nori will make dinner. At that point Dori and Balin will “just so happen to be in the neighborhood” and stop by (and they get there before Bombur so he always stammers for a different story to give), so it’s a full house for dinner. Bofur and Oin join them later, and Nori focuses on being annoyed that his overbearing relatives have taken over the house. (Because if he doesn’t focus on that, he’ll get emotional with the fact that his family has never been bigger and he’ll do something embarrassing like cry.) 

After they all leave (after offering terrible name suggestions for the baby that he’s scared Bofur is taking seriously.) Nori will prepare a bath for them both (It’s a good idea for Bofur to walk for a few steps, it lets them be closer for a little longer and those blasted mines are always so filthy. It also gives him an excuse to be close to a naked Bofur, and that’s never a bad thing). 

He wishes Bofur was having an easier time, but overall life is good. 


	7. Letters that Come and Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Nori's routine is disrupted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stevie_Foxx helped me out to do that Beta thing. 
> 
> And again, every kind comment left gives me so many positive feels.

His routine is shattered when he checks the mail after work and realizes that he has a letter and it’s from Ori. 

In his shock he actually dropped it. 

After a minute, he cursed himself and picked it up. 

That day, he did not write a letter. Instead, he rushed back to the house, fetched some water, and then stopped dead when he noticed the sink. 

Three bowl day. 

What was the world coming to?

After waking Bofur up, and having him take a drink, Nori quickly said that he’d received a response from his brother. Bofur did a spit-take and yelled at him for not telling him sooner. Ignoring the illogical statement, Nori tore it open and read it. 

Dear Nori,

I’ve seen nearly a hundred of your letters. And I’ve started and stopped this one at least a hundred times. I’m sorry for not replying sooner, but I didn’t know what to say. We didn’t really talk when I was in Erebor, and I can’t remember if we ever talked before I left. But you’re my brother, and we should talk because that’s what brothers do.

And you deserve the truth. 

The truth was that I felt guilty because I fell in love with the dwarf that had you arrested. But please don’t be mad – it turns out he doesn’t like me anyway. While I was in Erebor Balin took me to see him, only he wasn’t there. But I met his other suitors, and it’s plain they’re better for him then a scrawny dwarf who’s more like a hobbit anyway. 

That’s also why I haven’t replied sooner – I’m not sure what I really am. But I do know that I’m your brother, and I want to get to know you. So let’s start over. 

My name is Ori. I’m thirty-five years old, and I like to write, and travel to new places. I hate green food. 

Love, Ori

“Poor dear.” Bofur murmurs when Nori passes the letter to him. 

“It’s my fault.” He replies. “If it weren’t for me he would’ve grown up in the mountain.” Bofur is unimpressed with the self pity. 

“If it weren’t for you we wouldn’t have met.” His husband reminds him. Then he points to his own stomach, “And we wouldn’t be having this one. And I wouldn’t trade any of this for the Arkenstone.” 

Nori shifts. “Sap.” 

Bofur flaps a hand absent-mindedly. “I ‘ave a baby in me. What’s your excuse for getting emotional when the whole family’s over? You’re like a child.” Nori playfully, but gently (because Bofur's not fragile but he _is_ ) shoves him.  


From being friends, to sleeping together, to getting married, to expecting a baby, their relationship has changed so much, but absolutely nothing has changed between them. And Nori loves it. 

\--

He continues to write to Ori, and they develop as close of a relationship as two estranged brothers writing letters to each other can. Ori tells him about growing up in the Shire, about the odd little habits of hobbits, and about the kind of work he does for his adoptive father. Nori explains a little more about dwarrow customs (Ori likes his explanations more than Balin’s because the other dwarf says it like a lesson and Nori explains it as it applies to life, and Nori inwardly gloats that he has something on the fussy elder.) Nori also talks about how stifling the family is, and confides all his fears about the baby. Ori is surprisingly perceptive even with little experience on the matter (of babies – he’s only too familiar with fussy families) and still manages to give him good advice and relaxing tips. 

Nori also ends up exchanging letters with Belladonna Baggins, and never realizes that he had been a little resentful of her for being Ori’s mother. The bitter feelings are laid to rest when he gets to know her, and she tells him everything about Ori’s childhood that he’d ever wanted to know and more. She’s a wealth of information about her children, and Nori delights in expanding his own knowledge of embarrassing things about the three brothers. It’s beautiful. If he didn’t already have Bofur he’d be in love. 

Who’s he kidding. He’s absolutely in love. (But to his defense Bofur is too.) 

Ori also tells him about Bilbo, and the Crown Prince of Erebor himself. 

Well, of all the dwarves a hobbit can go for, better make it count apparently. 

In one of his letters, Ori explains that after his and Bofur’s celebration, Bilbo and Thorin had a nasty falling out. And that Bilbo had been miserable ever since. That Ori actually met the prince himself,  yelled at him , (and that’s when Nori realized just how much of kindred spirits they were and he’d never been more proud of a family member in his entire life) and delivered a letter to Bilbo that made him even more upset, and that Ori didn’t know how to make it right. Nori thought long and hard about his predicament, and showed it to Bofur. 

“Getting out of town could be good for them.” His husband mused. He’d been looking at their door, almost willing it to open with the power of his mind. Lately, Bofur had been getting stir-crazy (the dizzy spells and tiredness were getting to become more manageable, but no one wanted to take any chances.). Biased his advice was, Nori figured he had a point. In reply, he wrote: 

“You probably haven’t seen much beyond the Shire. Dori tells me it beautiful, and I’m sure he’s right. But the rest of the world isn’t as pretty as Hobbiton. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to stay, but try and see the world before you close yourself off.  Explore caves, get lost, find something new. From what Balin and Dori told me, you’re the smart one in the family, and you could be someone important if you believed in yourself more. I’m sorry about the things I did, and that I caused us to be separated. Dori lost his heart when he gave you away, and I lost my baby brother. I thought when you came for the wedding, everything would go back to the way is was before, but there never was a way the three of us had. I didn’t realize it until I saw the way you looked at my hair. But maybe one day, I can see you or you can see me, and we can have a real relationship. “

He then included several helpful tips on how to properly bind and tie someone if they were ever unwilling to go anywhere, because Bilbo wasn’t exactly on board with going anywhere. Bofur had mock-glared at him for teaching his little brother kidnapping techniques. Nori had refuted this - “more like surprise adoption tactics.”  It made Bofur laugh. 

\--

The next letter Nori received mentioned that Ori didn’t end up needing to use any of the “surprise adoption” techniques. 

A shame, really. 

Instead, Ori’s letter described going to Rivendell of all places (His commentary about the green food had him and Bofur cackling, and did he mention how proud he was of Ori for detesting green food alone?). Finally, his letters seemed to be happy, and not over-flowing with self-pity and desolation. It was a wonderful change. 

\--

Eavesdropping on conversations helped Nori make the news in the Mountain his own business. It meant that he knew the Prince and his Captain of the Guard were back before Dori and Balin officially told him. 

“I’m going to have words with my fool of a brother.” Balin had crossly assured them both. Thorin had told Ori about the ‘advice’ he gave Dwalin (and apologized a thousand times over for misconstruing the truth). Ori forgave him, but told his brothers about it. Balin had fumed silently for days, and Dori told Nori he was constantly muttering,  “Listening to the one dwarf thicker than himself about romance, rather than his elder brother who clearly knew how to properly court their One!”

Dori would always blush at the last bit, and Nori would always approve of Balin for making Dori blush like that. It was a pleasant reminder that after all the hell Dori’d gone through, there was someone to look after him and care for him the way he deserved. 

Hm. 

“Let me talk to him, after you do.” He said suddenly. 

Maybe he was turning into a sap, but everyone deserved someone, and no one deserved anyone more than his brothers did. One of them had already found their One. The other needed a bit of a push. 

Or a shove. 

A really hard shove. 


	8. Chapter 8

“’heard you were smitten with my baby bro.” 

It felt wonderful to watch Captain Dwalin jump a foot in the air in his own office, and the resulting smirk did nothing to mar Nori’s good cheer. 

“Get. Out.” The Captain snarled.

Nori gave him an innocent, “who me?” look. “Why? I thought the Captain of the Guard was there to speak with the people he protects?” 

Dwalin continued to glare, and Nori mused that if looks could kill he’d be in Mahal’s forges ten times over. 

Nevertheless, the former thief continued, “You know, you should be thanking me.” 

Dwalin snorted, but Nori was undeterred. “I’m going to help you get Ori back.”

Oh, so now suddenly Dwalin was interested in what he had to say. 

\--

As to why Nori talks to Thorin as well, to tell him that he can help him get a hobbit, he really doesn’t know. Maybe he feels sorry for Bilbo, who’s in so many of Ori’s letters. Maybe it’s out of a debt he feels he to the hobbit who made Ori feel at-home and welcome in the Shire when he was so little and scared. 

Maybe it’s for the joy of terrifying the Crown Prince in his own rooms and watching him jump a foot in the air. 

Can he just say it’s all three? 

Once he convinces Thorin not to have him arrested (it’s a close thing though and he promises himself to never tell Bofur or Dori or they’ll kill him) he repeats much of what he said to Dwalin to the other. 

Thorin seems suspicious, and says as much to Nori. 

In response, he rolls his eyes. “Don’t waste your breath being suspicious of me. Be suspicious of the Un clan – they’ve been making shady deals with Dain’s people in the Iron hills and are trying to usurp your line, like they’ve been doing since Khazad-dum.” He thought that had been obvious information, but by the look on Thorin’s face, he was apparently wrong. 

But it convinces Thorin that he doesn’t have an ulterior motive, and it gets the thick prince on board with his plan. 

\--

Nori realizes that, in the world of his brother and the fussy hobbit, he’s going to solve their problems. How is this his life now? 

\-- 

He feels bad with how easy it actually was, and resolves that when all is said and done he will be teaching his adorable brother of his about how to recognize and avoid surprise traps and ambushes. Ori agrees to meet him in Dale instantly, when his note hadn't even been subtle (in his opinion). 

The hardest part is convincing Bofur to stay behind. 

“I liked your little brother and that fussy hobbit! 

Nori points out the tiredness. 

“It’s Dale, not Gondor! We’d be there and back again before the sun went down!” 

Nori’s still not convinced, but he’s also with Bofur everyday, and he’s been seeing firsthand that being cooped up for so long is finally wearing him down. He’s honestly shocked it didn’t happen sooner. He really won’t forbid Bofur from going, but it makes him nervous all the same. 

\--

(Thorin nearly ruined Nori’s hard work by swimming in lakes and never looking anything short of majestic, and nearly destroying the surprise part of the surprise ambush. This royal family had no sense when it came to romantic confrontations.) 

\--

“For the love of Mahal – have you no ounce of finesse?” Nori was scolding. Thorin narrowed his eyes right back, and it was ridiculous that he could look so powerful and majestic while dripping completely wet.  Dwalin seemed to be tuning them both out in an attempt to repeat his mini-speech in his head, for when he’d finally get to talk to Ori. Bofur was laughing at them all, the unhelpful sod. 

“I don’t need to listen to this.” The Prince snapped, looking every bit the stubborn Durin. Nori, unimpressed and never knowing when to stop, rolled his eyes. 

“No wonder you don’t notice Markla stealing your treasury with your foolishness, and using it to bribe mining team forty-five to send her half their findings!” 

That made both Thorin and Dwalin both startle. 

“Markla?” Dwalin asked. Nori gave them a deadpan look. “It’s obvious, isn’t it?” What was with these Nobles? 

In that moment, he looked away to convey that thought to Bofur, and didn’t pay attention for the look the other two shared.  

\--

Seeing Ori for the second time face-to-face was a vast improvement on the first. 

Nori almost felt bad for ambushing him with Dwalin. Almost. 

Though the utterly betrayed look his baby brother shot him as they left the restaurant made him feel worse. 

Bilbo eyed them both as the two left. 

“Was that your plan?” Bilbo finally asked when they left.

Nori didn’t answer for a few moments. His fingers made an odd-tapping rhythm on the table (“He used to fiddle with his knife, but our relatives would kill him for doing that around me know” Bofur had said). Finally, Nori regaurd Bilbo. “You know my history with Dwalin, right?”

Bilbo nodded.

“I wasn’t happy when Dori told me they got sweet on each other. And I don’t trust the Durin folk. And after what they did with Dori, I hated them. But…” here he squeezed Bofur’s hand, “It’s different. I’m different. And Dori’s happy now. And according’ to him and your mother, Ori never let anyone outside the family affect him like that. So if I can do something  good  for this family for a change, I’ll do it.”

“You exchange letters with Mother?” Bilbo cried.

Nori glared at him. “I pour my heart to you and that’s what you take away?”

Bofur rolled his eyes. “That wasn’t pouring your heart out.”

“Oi! You’re s’posed to take my side on everything. I wrote a contract that says so!”

“No, you signed a ‘contract’ that stuck you with me as  I am wi’ you.” Bofur sh ot back confidently. “Terribly sorry.” He didn’t sound sorry in the least.

“My apologies,” Bilbo said backtracking and using the manners that Bungo would kill him for not having used previously, “that is very sweet of you to do for him.”

“Not just him laddie.” Nori gave a grin that had been his trademark from his thieving days -  It was the look of someone who had done something they shouldn’t, but couldn’t for the life of them regret it.

Bilbo’s face lost the blood in it. “No.”

“Yes.” In a motion a pregnant dwarf should not have been capable of, Bofur moved to sit next to him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. Bilbo was trapped.

“I will scream.” The hobbit threatened with a pout, and he hated them both in that moment for laughing.

“You’re adorable!” Bofur exclaimed. “Nori can we keep him?”

“Don’t see why not.” Nori replied. The look Bilbo gave him in response had him doubling over.  If looks could kill…

Nori watched Bilbo’s face turn ashen, and knew the Prince would have just walked in. “That’s our cue to leave this time.” Bofur said, and squeezed the hobbit. “Good luck.”

Nori gave Thorin a stiff nod, and the Prince returned it in kind, though his had a majestic aura to it that was entirely too unfair for someone who had been dripping wet earlier to have. It was also completely unfair that he was completely dry and in new clothes, still looking pristine. How was that even possible?

The two made their way out of the restaurant, and Nori made a beeline for the nearest bench they could sit at for Bofur’s sake. Nori broke the silence after they sat down. 

“You know what I kept thinking?” Bofur didn’t say anything. “This is for their own good. I feel like Dori now.” He scowled at himself. Bofur rolled his eyes in amusement. “You’re growing up.” He surmised, and Nori groaned. “It’s tragic, is what it is.”

But for the first time ever, he felt ready to be a father.  


	9. Baby it is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for the baby to get here!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At last, the convenient plot piece arrives! (Bori was a way to speed a wedding, and escalate the A&A story. He's been a very adorable and convenient plot piece, so I can't complain, truly.) 
> 
> Also, only one chapter to go! It's an entertaining one that I enjoyed writing. This chapter was also a lot of fun.

It really was for their own good. Dwalin and Ori come out of it officially courting, and he finally gets Ori to come back to the Mountain. Dori doesn’t cry when he and Ori tell him, but it’s a close thing. Bilbo and Thorin don’t start courting that day, but the hobbit ends up coming with Ori anyway as a “chaperone” for him (and how bloody convenient that Balin is “too busy” to properly chaperone his brother and Thorin offered to take his place). Now Nori has two brothers (both of which are basically getting married), one husband, one brother-through-marriage, a cousin-through-marriage, and now he has an adorable little hobbit-brother living with them, which is shocking on it’s own. (Bilbo yells at them everytime he and Bofur call him adorable, and deep down they know Bilbo is tough and a force to be reckoned with if he can make Prince Thorin nervous, but he’s so small it triggers their protective future-parent instincts all the same.) 

It’s more family then Nori knows what to do with. 

And of course, it’s not done growing. 

At that moment, Bofur was having the baby. 

Noblemen have a custom of not being allowed to be with the partner when the birth happens. Unfortunately, the people of the mountain now recognize the Ri line as a legitimate strand of nobility now because of their ties with the Fundin family, and that means Nori is stuck pacing outside of the birthing rooms. Part of the tradition states that one member from each family gets to be in the room instead. Bombur’s wife was chosen from Bofur’s side, because after having eight children she was a fantastic birthing coach herself. From Nori’s side, they picked Bilbo because he and Bofur became unlikely best friends during the hobbit’s time in the mountain, and Bilbo had similar experience with assisting in births. 

They’ve been in the healing center for several hours, and Oin had told him and Bofur both that it would be many hours before they were done, but it doesn’t stop Nori from feeling anxious. Dori and Ori joined him as soon as they heard (Bifur had been with them when Bofur went into labor, and rounded up the family while they went to the healing chambers.) It happened right when Nori came home from work (and his daily routine changed from going to the post office to hear from Ori to going to the guard tower to talk to Captain Dwalin of all people about what he overhears in the mines – and to tease him about Ori because Nori is very much a sarcastic shit when it suits his mood.) 

Apparently he hears information that Balin and Dwalin miss in regards to the line of Durin, and it’s valuable information to have. Thorin approaches him after Ori and Bilbo move into the mountain about becoming his spymaster. It’s a secret position that can obviously never be revealed to the public. He’ll continue to work at the mines at the moment, but at this point it’s a farce to cover up what he’s really doing. And if he can find a different way to get information, he’s free to do that instead. 

It’s the perfect position for him. 

So he’s in the middle of explaining what the sudden influx of rangers will mean to Erebor when Ori bursts through the door to tell him that Bifur was taking Bofur to Oin because he was having the baby. 

Things get blurry after that, but the next thing he knows he’s there, pacing while Bombur’s wife, Bilbo, and his husband are in the next room. 

Ori and Dwalin go with him, and Dwalin gets his own revenge by laughing at the nervous wreck he becomes. Ori scolds him, but internally Nori is grateful because it actually does help his nervousness to scowl back at his not-yet brother-in-law. 

Dori gets there next, and promises that Balin and Thorin will be there eventually but can’t quite leave their meeting. Nori doesn’t much care, but Dori doesn’t seem offended and just hands him snacks. He eats without tasting anything then paces some more. 

At some point during the next few hours, Balin and Thorin arrive, but Nori is deaf to all conversation until Bombur’s wife is at the door, and she has blood on her, and Nori nearly faints before she breaks into a wide grin and announces that there’s a baby, it’s a boy, and Nori’s a father. 

“May Mahal preserve us all.” Dwalin intones and Ori hits him. Dori cries. 

Nori pushes past her and sees Bilbo, who’d been sitting next to Bofur. Bofur looks exhausted, but he’s smiling like usual and that’s what tells Nori that they’ll be ok. 

The two friends are looking at the bundle in Bofur’s arms. 

“I can’t believe I have one of these.” Bofur whispers loudly to the hobbit. Bilbo nods in agreement.     “Nori still is one of these.” He adds, and Nori’s indignant “Oi!” is lost under Bofur’s snort. 

Bilbo gets up as he gets closer, and gives the stunned dwarf a hug. “Congratulations,” he whispers, and gives Nori as smile before leaving to join the others in the next room. Nori takes Bilbo’s place, but slides so he’s partially sitting on the bed next to Bofur. His husband shifts as much of his lethargic body will allow, so they can be shoulder-to-shoulder. 

That’s when Nori gets his first glance at the baby. 

Dimly, he recalls when Ori was a baby. (because that was the only experience with babies Nori has) He was a scrawny little thing. And his brother grew up to be adorable, but he’d looked like a dried fruit for the first few days of his life. He’d love his son regardless, but Nori figured that the baby would take a few days before looking presentable. 

He was wrong. This one was perfect. 

Bofur laughs at him (how much of that had he said out loud?) and hands the baby to him. There’s a moment of panic, but Bofur reminds him that he’s exhausted and Nori takes him without a second thought before realizing what he’s just done. 

Then he marvels that he’s holding a child, and it’s his child and he made this kid, and how is this his life? 

“He needs a name.” Bofur’s eyes are closed, but he’s not asleep yet. Nori nods, but when he belatedly realizes that Bofur can’t see him because his eyes are closed, he verbally agrees. 

“You know,” Bofur continues, “I’ve heard suggestions from everyone in the family, but not yours.”

“I haven’t really had one.” Nori says. 

“Liar.” 

Nori grins. His husband was the best. 

“Alright. There’s one. But it’s stupid.” 

“We got married, and that means I’m the only one that gets to laugh at you when you're stupid. What is it?”

“It’s a bit of my name and a bit of yours. Bori.”

Because they knew this child would be considered of the Ri line. Dori’s past the bearing age (and honestly he raised Nori, and Ori, and to an extent Fili and Kili so in no way is he interested in having his own), and any of Ori’s children would be considered part of the Fundin line. 

But that doesn’t mean he can’t pay homage to Bofur’s family at least in some way. 

Bofur opens his eyes and smiles at him. It takes Nori back to that first smile Bofur gave him when they first met, and Captain Dwalin had gruffly introduced them and Nori hated that dwarf for being so cheerful. 

Honestly, it’s the smile that made him fall in love.

“Bori it is.”

And Bori it is. 


	10. A Family of Thieves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dwalin needs to steal Ori like a proper Hobbit should to get married. But if anyone could stop a guard-turned-thief, at least Ori's brother is a thief-turned-guard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story had been loads of fun to write - this chapter in particular. I hope more will come - there needs to be at least a one-shot (fat chance I can do that) from Dori's perspective. Then we need Ori's courtship/wedding, and then the mayhem Frodo's going to cause before Bilbo and Thorin get hitched. And let's realize that Thorin is going to get Ideas from this hobbit tradition. 
> 
> I'd like to thank everyone who left a kudos or a comment. They were an incredible source of confidence and love. And, as always, the biggest thanks to my beta-reader Stevie_Foxx.

On the day of Ori’s wedding, Nori suddenly empathises with how his little brother had been feeling at his wedding, because he can’t seem to stop shaking.

Bilbo is annoyed with him for this.

“You must stop that! Today is about Ori.” The two of them are standing outside Ori’s old room in Bag End, waiting for the dwarf to let them know he’s ready for them. Dori’s at the front door of the smial, keeping it barred. It’s a playful hobbit-wedding day tradition – for the intendor to “break-in” and “steal” the intendee away. It’s supposed to be a lot of great fun with general teasing. In their youth, Ori and Bilbo had never actively been part of a keepaway, but enough of their relatives got married for them to know how it was properly done. And being proper was key to a successful hobbit-wedding.

Wisely, no one commented much on the oddity of two dwarrow getting married like hobbits in Hobbiton.

“I don’t want to mess this up for him.” Nori murmurs in reply, so Ori can’t hear him. It’s a deep-rooted fear that hasn’t quite gone away yet – the fact that he’d ruined so much for Ori, and one mistake feels like failing him again. Bilbo’s eyes soften at this.

“This may sound silly, and I really can’t say this to anyone else, but I’m glad everything happened the way it did.” Nori blinked at him. Bilbo flushes ever so slightly. “Well, it’s true. Dori brought Ori here, and I got to have him for a brother. And then Ori met Dwalin. And I met Thorin-“ here he absently tugs on his braid – a promise of his intent with the Prince - a nervous gesture that’s become habit for him, “And I can call you and Dori brothers, in a way. Not every hobbit gets to include dwarrow in their family.”

It’s a good thing that Ori asks for one of them at that moment, because Nori’s eyes were beginning to mist dangerously. In the keep-away tradition, there should be a family member there along every step of the way – on the path, behind the door to the smial, outside of the room, and with the intended him(or her)self. Frodo is waiting on the path, Dori is behind the door, Bilbo will stay in the hall and Nori gets to be with Ori himself. The burglar is allowed to have at least one other person “fight” with him, and he knew Thorin and Balin were helping him to a certain degree. Though helping was an exaggeration.

Nori went inside the room and gave Ori a hug. “You look beautiful.” He told his brother. Ori had a wonderful assortment of flowers atop his head, in hobbit tradition. The rest of his clothing was proper for a dwarven wedding. Ori flushed a little and playfully hit him. The two sat on his bed as there was a loud crash that rang through the home. Ori winced.

“Father is going to be very unhappy if the door is broken.”

“They got to rush – they were late.”

“Bet Thorin guided them” Ori quipped at Nori laughed. To the Kingdom of Erebor, Prince Thorin was a majestic leader who would rule them all well, but to their family, Thorin was banned from looking at any maps or making any traveling decisions.

They could hear Dori dramatically call out, “You’ll never get in!” And Dwalin yelling back, “Why are you even guarding the door?” (Because they may very well not get in now) And Dori let out an evil, albiet overdramatic laugh.

The keep-away is supposed to be all in good fun, but there does need to be a certain amount of thought put in on both the burglar and the intended, to show the dedication both partners have to one another. Ori’s extent in giving Dwalin a challenge had been putting Dori at the door. They’d yet to see what Dwalin would do in response.  

“You’ll let us through!” Thorin shouted back, keeping his voice just as dramatic.

“Hardly.” Dori retorted.

“We have a hostage.” Balin called out, in that calm demeanor.

“Hi Dori!” they could hear Frodo’s muffled voice. Ori laughed when he heard Bilbo groan.

“Frodo!” Dori scolded, “You were supposed to run away and keep them out longer!”

“Thorin gave me a cookie.” Frodo explained. “Sorry.” Nori snorted and they heard the door open. Dori could be heard telling Frodo to change his shirt, and Balin, in a rare show of dramatics, cried that Dori was just too strong for them and that Dwalin and Thorin better leave him behind to take care of him.

“Oh if that’s what you think of me,” Dori was retorting in mock indignation, and Nori was glad he couldn’t see in the doorway because by now he knew for certain Balin had roped him into a kiss. And he may be a father but he was still immature enough to groan that his older brother kissed his husband.

They heard the other two run in the direction of Ori’s room, and Bilbo very firmly told them that Ori was not to be receiving any visitors that day.

It was Bilbo’s following yelp that meant Thorin hadn’t even tried to be coy, and simply picked him up. The hobbit did laugh though, and told Ori and Nori to be ready and that he was so sorry that there wasn’t anymore help he could be.

It was now Nori’s job to take care of his little brother. He respects that Dwalin carefully opens the door, and the former thief and the captain of the Guard slowly size each other up.

“You want to steal my brother from me.” Nori accuses, because this irony is too rich to pass up. Dwalin smirks at him and gives an, “aye” in confirmation.

“You have any more hostages hidden in that cloak of yours?” Nori asks suspiciously, and for a second he’s worried Bofur gave Bori to Dwalin for that very reason, because that’s the exact sort of thing his husband would do, but Dwalin seems to realize that’s what he’s thinking and shakes his head. Nori feels relieved.  

“Nope. But you’re not gonna stop me.” Dwalin proclaims confidently. Nori tilts his head, and makes a fighting stance. He wishes he had one of his knives, but weapons during a Keep-away are a major taboo. Dwalin matches his fighting stance, but there’s something off. The trained warrior keeps smirking at him, but makes no effort to attack. He’s waiting for Nori.

Nori tries to match his smirk, even though a suspicious pit forms in his stomach. Dwalin knows he would not attack first, so why is he stalling?

By the time it hits him, he’s too late.

Dwalin never intended to steal Ori. Just cause enough of a commotion to distract them all so the real thief could grab him.

Before he turned back around (and is subsequently tackled by Dwalin from behind) Ori’s window has been opened and Bofur (incredulously) is grabbing him.

Ori’s laughter can be heard all the way down Bagshot row as Bofur, in a show of dramatics, hoists him over his shoulder and, with some strategic maneuvering, gets them both out the window. Nori is shouting words of betrayal to his husband as they disappear from sight, and make their way to the Wedding Tree.

Dwalin gets off him as Bilbo enters Ori’s room. The hobbit shakes Dwalin’s hand and congratulates him on a well-down Thievery. Dwalin smiles and thanks him.

“Thorin and I are leaving now, and Balin and Dori already left with Frodo.” Bilbo says, “You two better hurry along before you’re late. And a Baggins is never late.”

With that he goes, dragging Thorin behind him.

There is a tense silence between them as the last inhabitants of Bag End leave. 

Even after all these years, things have still been awkward between them. It doesn’t matter that their older brothers are married. Even Nori’s new profession hasn’t made them friends, merely civil. But after today it will be different. Dwalin himself will be his brother-through-marriage, and by marrying Ori. Which Nori would have never seen coming.

And Nori will always feel like he owes Ori, no matter what Bofur or Bilbo will say.

That’s what gives him the courage to clear his throat, and get his attention. Dwalin looks over at him, and Nori says, “We need to talk, clear the air before you marry Ori.” Dwalin is silent for a moment, then nods.

Because Nori’s the one who asked him to wait, he goes first. “For a time, a long time, I’d hated you. And hated myself because it wasn’t your fault. But-“ And here he’s cut off because Dwalin raises a hand to speak.

“No, it’s alright you hated me.” He says. “After we arrested you that time, and ‘fore Dori showed up, I told the Princess what had happened. How do you think she made it there at the last moment?”

Dwalin had been stalling for time.

“I knew she’d help you, because you’re Durin’s folk. I jus’ didn’t know what she’d want. And I’m sorry for indirectly splitting your family like that.”

Nori was stunned. “Why did you do that?”

Dwalin looked uncomfortable. “I understood your motivation. It was for your older brother. But you still broke the law, and my hands were tied.”

For a moment, Nori didn’t say anything. But then, for the first time, he gave Dwalin an honest smile.

“I don’t think I’d ever approved of you marrying Ori so much until today.”

\---

Compared to the road it took them to court, to the dwarven courtship, to the Hobbit wedding day tradition, the wedding itself was incredibly unexciting.

It was beautiful.

They were married by the Thain of the Shire, a cousin of Bilbo’s. (And upon arriving back in Erebor, Thorin would present their marriage contract to them in his office.) Everyone stood under the Marriage Tree, no specific people standing with Ori or Dwalin. They were all together. It was fitting, at least in Nori’s mind.

Because they were all a family. Nosy, dysfunctional, noisy, dramatic and insane.

But it was good.  

**Author's Note:**

> Comments? Questions? Leave a review! Send a message! 
> 
> Love any and all feedback (unless it's rude, then I'll love it less).


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